Matthew’s story

When Matthew arrived at National Star, he was isolated and reserved after experiencing significant trauma and distress in his previous placement. Matthew’s previous experiences resulted in Matthew being isolated from others and social environments. Over time, this led to an overwhelming fear of noise, people, confined spaces and education, all of which Matthew communicated as severe distress. The impact on Matthew and his family was profound, and eventually his parents made the difficult decision to withdraw him from the setting to protect his wellbeing.

Understanding and respecting Matthew’s past experiences and the emotional weight he carried was central to the support we provided. From the very beginning, the focus was not on traditional educational outcomes but on helping Matthew feel safe, secure, and able to engage with the world around him again, at his own pace. 

Building safety and trust

On arrival, Matthew was fearful even of his own en-suite bathroom. Staff recognised that something many would consider an everyday space represented a source of anxiety for Matthew. Through careful, consistent and patient support, facilitators spent six weeks gently encouraging Matthew to build confidence around his bathroom. This was achieved through reassurance, routine and respect for Matthew’s needs, without ever pushing him beyond what he could tolerate.

Today, Matthew independently accesses his en-suite for personal care routines and showers daily.

Another significant milestone was Matthew’s relationship with sleep. Prior to coming to National Star, Matthew had never slept in a bed and always used a mattress on the floor. Matthew now sleeps in a bed every night, both at home and in college. This change reflects not only improved practical skills but a growing sense of safety and comfort in his environment.

Reconnecting with others

Social interaction was previously extremely challenging for Matthew. Meals had always been eaten alone in his room, away from others. Recently, Matthew has started to eat occasional meals in the communal areas of his residence. This marked a significant shift in his ability to tolerate shared spaces and be around others.

Matthew is now spending increasing amounts of time in the communal lounge. He is showing recognition of peers, pointing to them and demonstrating that he knows their names. Matthew has begun sitting on the sofas, interacting with both staff and peers, laughing and smiling. What began as occasional short periods has now become a daily occurrence.

Changes beyond college

The impact of Matthew’s progress has extended beyond National Star and into home life. During the break, Matthew’s mum reported noticeable changes. Matthew showed increased confidence and independence at home, making choices about what he wanted to eat and deciding when he was ready for bed, something he had not been able to do previously.

Perhaps most moving for the family was Matthew’s ability to join in and enjoy family visits. Historically, this would have been overwhelming for him, and he would quickly retreat to his room. Now, Matthew remains present, engaged and happy, allowing his family to see a side of him they had not been able to see before.

Towards the end of the holidays, Matthew became a little unsettled. When his mum gently asked whether he was missing National Star, Matthew immediately signed ‘yes’. When asked if he wanted to return, he signed ‘yes’ again without hesitation. Although this initially surprised his mum, it also brought her great reassurance and happiness, as it showed just how safe, settled and positive Matthew feels about being at National Star.

Matthew’s Mum shared: ‘When Matthew came home, we could see that he had gained independence and was keen to make his own choices. Matthew let me know that he was missing college and that he was ready to come back. He was very happy when I told him that he would be returning on Sunday! It’s wonderful to see how he’s grown. I hadn’t expected to see such growth regarding his independence and it’s fantastic to see. Matthew’s sensory needs are demanding, and residential staff have spent time and attention getting to know him and gaining his trust.’

Personal Learning Coordinator shared: ‘It is inspiring to see the progress Matthew has made since joining National Star, benefiting from a stimulating environment with varied opportunities to explore and interact. His engagement in sessions varies, and he shows preferences for certain spaces. The multi-disciplinary team (MDT) has adapted strategies and his timetable to support his needs, recognising that much of his learning occurs outside traditional classrooms. His social interaction is increasing, particularly through nursery rhymes and objects of reference, though he can become frustrated at times. Support from staff and Speech and Language Therapists (SLT) has helped manage this. Matthew is building trust, forming relationships, consistently engaging in life skills activities and enjoying new environments. Observations show growing confidence, stronger connections to his learning, and increased curiosity.

A team effort

Matthew’s progress is the result of dedicated, collaborative and creative multi‑disciplinary working. This has included significant input from the Emotional Wellbeing Service (EWS), advice and hands-on support from Director of Services, John Mann, and extensive liaison between teams to ensure everyone understood Matthew’s needs, communication and triggers. The residential team has shown exceptional patience, commitment and flexibility, often thinking creatively and “outside the box” to find approaches that truly work for Matthew.

Although Matthew’s journey may not yet reflect traditional educational measures, the foundations he is building in trust, safety, independence, and connection are life changing.